fat cats are cute

Monday, August 15, 2005


Gwen Stefani’s “Hollaback Girl” is one of the most baffling pieces of music of the modern age. It’s got something to do with cheerleaders—that much is clear, judging from the chanting and the marching band that’s honking and tooting in the background. Beyond that, good luck deciphering the song’s ambiguities. We were so vexed by the mystery that is “Hollaback Girl” that we have devoted countless hours to its study. Our conclusions are below. The first thing you should know, though, is that Gwen is not singing “I ain’t no Harlem fat girl”—at least, we don’t think she is. Read full article.
- Greg Stacy
OC Weekly

Sunday, August 14, 2005

Girl, Interrupted

Pet Peeve number 581:

When a television show is preempted for a sports game. Not even a big game, a pre-season game. This happened twice this week.

Thursday Night
The last episode of ABC’s addictive reality show, “Hooking Up” which follows 11 women through the maze of online dating in New York was replaced by a San Diego Chargers pre-season game. An angry Christina requests I TIVO the last 45 minutes and wonders if they would air it again at a later date. ABC isn’t cable, they won’t air it again. DVDs can be purchased at the ABC online store. But, it’s not worth the money.

Saturday Night
After returning home from a work related BBQ, I’m excited to watch the Saturday installment of “Big Brother 6.” I click over to my “Now Playing List.” Wait a minute, the last episode listed is from Thursday! I click over to the Guide and realize that CBS aired a preseason game of the San Francisco 49ers playing some other team! Christina re-capped and I get updated through the awesome Big Brother hamster watch site. Seeing posted stills of Kaysar from the Big Brother Feed is not the same as watching him give away the Head of Household Challenge. Kasyar, how could you?!

Moving on, I have to mention another example of when the network or local station decided to air a sports game instead of regular programming. Flash back months ago and the Lakers are playing the Clippers. That same game was also played on Fox Sports West and KCAL 9 (the official Lakers channel in Los Angeles). Did they really need to air the game on the WB too? I return home from work and find that “Gilmore Girls” is not on. This was a pivotal episode of last season when Lorelai got into a fight with her mother. Okay, they do that every episode, but this one Lorelai was especially mean. Or so I heard. To make matters worse, the Saturday they were supposed re-air the episode was switched to Thursday. I had no idea and neither did TIVO.

What’s the point of ESPN, Fox Sports or the other dozen channels that air sporting events? I totally understand the big three networks airing finals or semi-finals. Just don’t interrupt regularly scheduled programming and put in games that can be easily shown on a SPORTS channel.

Monday, August 08, 2005

Traveling Pants

Shopping for jeans is never ending. You can have many pairs, but you’ll always be in search of “the one.” I get recommendations on where to get them, what fits the best, or the cutest fade. But, it’s all comes down to personal preference and tolerance.

I’ve never spent more than 100 dollars on jeans, but I can understand why somebody would. You can dress them up or down. They can make your legs skinnier, your butt bigger or smaller. They’re jeans! But, the execution in trying to find your favorite can be exhausting. I really have to mentally prepare myself. The store can’t be cold and many malls stores tend to turn their AC up to the max. Can I get some earmuffs to go with that pair of ridiculously distressed jeans? I just don’t want to try on jeans in a cold environment. It makes the denim feel stiff. Sure I’ll wear jeans outside when it might be cold, but those are jeans that have been broken in. I can’t eat a big meal or feel bloated. That will just cause me to buy a size too large. Then they’ll just stretch and become saggy and unflattering. I need the jeans organized by size or at least folded by size and categories. I’m not a good bargain shopper for that reason. Pillaging through stacks or racks of unorganized clothing is not my forte. I also prefer a store to have a petite section for my short Asian legs.

What makes a good jean for me is, of course, the fit. More importantly the fit around the waist. I favor the low cut jeans, but not too low. It has to hit at a certain point below the belly button, but doesn’t cut into the section right before. If it does, I tend to get a muffin top where the fat spills over the side. But, a good cut jean doesn’t do that to my stomach. Second, is the fit around the butt and the legs. Third is the length. No matter how “short” or “petite” the length is always long for me. Sometimes I hem, other times I just cuff them over. It’s really a lost cause at this point. If you hem too much then you lose the boot cut or the flare. Lastly, is the feel and look of the fabric. I cannot stand starchy jeans. Also, if the fabric has lines it or a cross hatch pattern they tend to be uncomfortable from the inside. It feels like pieces of sand poking at my thighs. I’ve also come to the conclusion that my body is not made for designer jeans. Searching for them at wholesale prices is a futile experience for me. Where the pant is supposed to be tight on the thigh, is tight on my knee. Obviously made for someone taller than 5’.

I go through phases of having the perfect pair, but the feeling and the jean doesn’t last. I find “the one” and wear it constantly. I’ll try to buy the same one but it’s never same. So, I go into the next phase and find the next “one.” Sometimes, I’ll put on the favorite pair from last year and wonder, “Wow, how did I ever wear these? They are so tight/high/ill fitting!” I have a stack of about 10 jeans right now on a chair. I probably only wear 3 of them. One happens to be my favorite right now, the other I call my “saggy butt” jeans. I can only wear them one time after washing because they get really loose. Again, they were good in theory when I tried them on at the store.

I’ll keep searching, trial and error. I’m not discouraged, that’s my jeaneology.